If you’re looking for how to propose to your girlfriend or what to say when proposing to your girlfriend then this is the wrong post. But if you want to pop the Q and you’re not quite sure what your partner’s reaction will be then read on.When you’re in a relationship, there are certain things to consider before popping the question, otherwise, you might end up getting disappointed or embarrassed (in the case of a public proposal like the ICM proposal). Unfortunately, it doesn’t matter if you’ve been together for 3 months or 3 years, you need to have a proper discussion with your partner about when they want to get married otherwise you can use these 8 telltale questions and signs to figure out if they’re ready or not.
How does she feel about marriage?
It’s easy to tell how a woman feels about marriage. A lot of people have been put off the idea of marriage and with the influence of feminism, a lot of women are now speaking up against the standards set by society especially the Nigerian society. Is she the type that values the traditional Nigerian type of marriage, does she believe in equality in marriage or does she abhor the idea of marriage entirely? the answer to either of these questions will determine if she’s going to accept that ring.
She’s still hung up on her ex
If she still has feelings for her ex or still communicates actively with her ex then popping a ring is a no-no, because marriage is a dual commitment not a threesome or love triangle.
Is she ready to be a mother?
It’s one thing to want to get married and it’s another to be a mother. Bearing the responsibility of a child is something you’re never fully prepared for physically, mentally or emotionally. Unless you’ve both had the talk and decided you’re not having kids yet (which should be backed up with birth control), it’s important to know where she stands on the topic.
She still has doubts
She randomly calls you at 2A.M. to ask if you love her, she has doubts about your relationship, these are signs that she’s not ready to get hitched. These problems are only going to become more glaring after the engagement and might lead to her calling off the engagement or the whole relationship entirely.
She’s not aware of your financial status
Is your SO aware of how much you earn or are worth? If you’re going to be spending the rest of your life with this person there’s no use keeping this information from them. If she’s used to a more extravagant lifestyle which you can barely or can’t keep up with, it needs to be talked over. Will she be willing to give it all up for a 100k salary spouse?
Is she ready to sacrifice her lifestyle and begin a new life?
Depending on the kind of lifestyle she leads currently for an entirely new fusion of both your lives. Maybe her usual saturday is a club party/girls night out and yours are for staying home to watch sitcoms. You both might have to compromise and set a new standard.
She’s going through a rough period in her life
A life-changing decision such as marriage cannot be made under duress so make sure the timing is right. If you’re going to propose, pick a time when she’s absolutely stress-free.
Have you broken up several times?
If your relationship is a series of break ups and make ups then I promise your marriage will most likely end up in divorce. You need to address the real issue behind your separation and inconsistency and fix it otherwise don’t go ahead with the wedding plans. Getting married won’t fix those problems.
If you’ve assessed these signs critically and you’re sure she’s ready then go ahead and pop that question! All the best.